第二届“潮起大湾”世界华文散文诗大赛金奖作品《一只扬帆的蝴蝶》点评

作者: ASP 诗苑人气: 1525 日期: 2025/9/3

The 2nd “Rising Tide of the Greater Bay” World Chinese Prose Poetry Competition Gold Award Work — A Butterfly Setting Sail.

第二届“潮起大湾”世界华文散文诗大赛金奖作品《一只扬帆的蝴蝶》点评

一只扬帆的蝴蝶

文/苏朱（ Sue Zhu, New Zealand ）

几载蛰伏，破茧而出，一只金裳凤蝶。

基因的突变，你身体的版图呈现出不规则蝶形。天意的偏袒，5.6万平方公里，11宫格的经纬间，你不循常规，成为了“不完美”主题的标新立异主义者，叛逆经典对称美学的桎梏，以不羁之姿，重塑潮流新概念。

你精致的纹理，宕跌的舞步，在梳理风的毫发间会震落每一片花瓣，让咫尺此岸抑或千里外异地，掀起飓风和海啸。

你以碳纤维为翼，树脂作桅，勇超古老的舟楫·，五洲四海里，你迎潮而泅。

云，在你的脊背上停驻；北斗，引领你收揽万象。文人墨客们为你斗量汪洋，你被托举，被接纳，你是起舞潮头的新贵！

四季里，日轮的俯视下，你非对称双翼的每一次翕动，都越发臻于平衡之美！

天空不再吝啬神赐的特许，赠予你惠风和畅、霞光万丈, 也一并赠你风火相拥、霆击穹宇。

青帆直挂，踏浪争雄。起伏间，你用一枚铜钱，引领时代的潮汐！

点评：

苏朱的《一只扬帆的蝴蝶》似乎是一首为中国大湾经济特区而作的散文诗，原因在于其表述的恰似蝴蝶的地形面貌和后面段落的叙述。以下是对这首诗的详细点评：

1. 意象的象征性与地域关联

金裳凤蝶是香港法例保护的昆虫，诗人以“金裳凤蝶”作为大湾区的象征，生动描绘了其从“蛰伏”到“破茧而出”的蜕变。这一意象不仅隐喻了大湾区经济的崛起非一日之功，也暗示了其在文化、科技等多领域的全面突破，寓意深刻且富有诗意。

“不规则的蝶形”：通过“基因突变”和“不完美”的意象，“5.6万平方公里的11宫格”直接点明大湾区区域的构建，而“不完美的标新立异主义者”，隐喻这些城市并非传统意义上对称均衡的，诗人以此打破对传统对称美学的追求，暗示其在全球化浪潮中的独特定位和特色。这种“不羁之姿”更是对经济区特有的发展模式的赞美，凸显了大湾区敢于突破常规、重塑潮流的魄力。

2. 隐喻的深刻与经济寓意

诗中“扬帆”与“桅杆”的隐喻，将大湾区比作一艘扬帆起航的巨轮，象征着其在全球经济海洋中的引领作用。“碳纤维和树脂”这一现代材料的引入，进一步强调了大湾区的高科技与创新属性，而“超越古老的舟楫”则暗示大湾区继承传统的同时，又超越历史的局限，必将走向更广阔的未来。

“五洲四海里，迎潮而泅”不仅描绘了大湾区的地理优势，也隐喻其作为中国经济引擎在全球的影响力。蝴蝶的舞步“震落每一片花瓣”并“掀起飓风和海啸”，则暗示了大湾区在经济、文化甚至政治领域可引发的连锁反应，彰显其作为“弄潮家族的新贵”的地位。

3. 比喻的生动与时代感

诗中“北斗，云”等意象，将北斗导航系统比喻为大湾区的指引者，体现了中国科技的力量和大湾区在其中的引领作用。“北斗”不仅象征着科技，也代表了中国文化的自信与全球化视野。“云”则预示着大湾区在数字经济时代的无限可能。

“文人墨客为你斗量汪洋”则通过文化视角，展现了大湾区在经济之外的软实力，凸显其作为文化交汇点的独特。

“四季里，日轮俯视”这一比喻，将大湾区置于全球视野中，再次暗示其在国际舞台上的重要地位。而“非对称双翼的每一次翕动，越发臻于平衡之美”则巧妙地将大湾区的不均衡发展升华为一种新的美学概念，体现其在多元与统一之间的动态平衡。

4. 语言的别致与节奏感

诗歌语言富有节奏感，如“精致的纹理，宕跌的舞步” 等句子，既有视觉上的美感，又通过音韵的起伏营造出一种舞蹈般的韵律感。这种语言的节奏与大湾区快速发展的步伐相呼应。“碳纤维为翼，树脂作桅”等语言风格的多层次性，又使得诗歌在形式与内容上达到了高度的统一。

“青帆直挂，踏浪争雄”等句子则通过短促有力的语言，展现了大湾区在时代浪潮中的勇往直前，颇具力量与时代感。

5. 主题的多元性与时代意义

诗歌不仅仅是对大湾区经济特区的赞美，更是对全球化时代中个体与区域发展的深刻思考。蝴蝶的“非对称双翼”象征着大湾区在传统与现代、本土与国际之间的独特融合，而其“臻于极致平衡之美”则暗示了在不完美中寻找新的发展可能。

结尾“你用一枚铜钱，引领时代的潮汐”，铜钱作为古代货币，象征着经济的力量，形似舵轮，用以领航。把大湾区比作引领时代潮流的先锋，加重指出大湾区在全球经济体系中的不可或缺之地位和持续性。这一结尾既进一步升华了主题，留给读者无限的想象空间。

6. 与大湾区发展主题的契合

整首诗通过蝴蝶的意象，巧妙地将大湾区的地理风貌、经济特色、文化与时代精神融为一体。诗歌从“破茧而出”到“逐浪争雄”，从现状到未来，结构上层层递进，每一节都紧扣鲜明的主题。

大湾区作为中国改革开放的前沿阵地，其创新、开放与包容的精神在诗中得到了淋漓尽致的展现。蝴蝶的蜕变与飞翔，不仅是大湾区发展的隐喻，也是中国在全球舞台上崛起的象征。

总结：《一只扬帆的蝴蝶》通过丰富的意象、巧妙的隐喻和生动的比喻，成功地将大湾区经济特区的崛起与全球化时代的潮流相结合。诗歌语言精致，节奏感强，主题多元且富有时代意义。这首诗不仅是对大湾区的赞美，更是对时代中个体与区域发展的独特见解，具有现实意义与艺术价值。

The 2nd “Rising Tide of the Greater Bay” World Chinese Prose Poetry Competition Gold Award Work — A Butterfly Setting Sail.

Organized by the Hong Kong Chinese Prose Poetry Society, and co-organized by the International Chinese Poets Association, Hong Kong Chinese Prose Poetry magazine, World Chinese Poetry News, the Guangdong Writers Association, among others, with support from the Hong Kong Cultural and Arts Foundation, the “Rising Tide of the Greater Bay” — The Second World Chinese Prose Poetry Competition was grandly launched.

After half a year of submissions and evaluations, the event successfully concluded, and on June 21, 2025, an award ceremony was held in Shenzhen.

The New Zealand Chinese poet Sue Zhu won the competition’s top honour — the Gold Prize. Her winning work and accompanying critique are presented below.

A Butterfly Setting Sail

By Sue Zhu (New Zealand)

After years of hibernation, breaking free from its cocoon—
emerges a golden-clad swallowtail butterfly.

A mutation of genes shaped your body into an irregular silhouette of wings.
Heaven’s bias granted you 56,000 square kilometres,
a chessboard of eleven lattices.
You defied convention—
a maverick of the “imperfect,”
rebelling against the shackles of symmetrical aesthetics.
With an untamed grace,
You reshaped the very concept of style.

Your delicate patterns, your plunging dance steps—
each time you comb through the filaments of wind,
Every petal trembles loose.
From this very shore, or a thousand miles away,
Hurricanes and tsunamis rise in your wake.

With carbon fibre as wings, resin as mast,
You surpassed the ancient vessels.
Across oceans and continents,
You swim against the tide.

Clouds rest upon your spine.
The Big Dipper guides you,
gathering the myriad forms of the world.
Writers and poets measure oceans for you;
you are lifted, embraced—
the new noble at the crest of the tide.

Through the four seasons,
under the sun’s downward gaze,
each asymmetric flutter of your wings
moves ever closer to perfect balance.

The sky no longer withholds its divine concession.
It bestows you with gentle winds, radiant skies,
and with them—
the embrace of fire and storm,
The thunder strikes across the heavens.

Blue sails unfurled, waves beneath your keel.
In your rise and fall,
with a single copper coin,
You steer the tides of an age.

Commentary

Sue Zhu’s “A Butterfly Setting Sail” reads like a prose poem dedicated to the Guangdong-Hong Kong-Macao Greater Bay Area. The imagery, tone, and structure suggest an allegorical mapping of butterfly form to the region’s geography and destiny. Below is a detailed critique:

1. Symbolism and Regional Association
The golden swallowtail butterfly, a protected species in Hong Kong, is used as the central metaphor for the Greater Bay Area. Its transformation from “hibernation” to “emergence” mirrors the region’s rise, achieved not overnight but through years of evolution. The “irregular butterfly shape” symbolises the Bay’s uneven geography, while the “11 lattices of 56,000 square kilometres” directly reference its eleven core cities. By rejecting symmetry as an ideal, the poem elevates the region’s asymmetry into a new aesthetic of bold innovation.

2. Metaphorical Depth and Economic Implications
The imagery of sails, masts, and carbon fibre links tradition with modernity. The Bay Area is cast as a vessel surpassing ancient ships, a navigator in the global economy. The mention of “carbon fibre” and “resin” underscores its high-tech identity. Likewise, the butterfly’s wingbeats shaking petals into storms suggest the region’s ripple effects on global finance, culture, and politics.

3. Vivid Comparisons and Contemporary Resonance
Symbols like “clouds” and “the Big Dipper” emphasise guidance and technological prowess, evoking China’s Beidou satellite system as both a scientific and cultural compass. Meanwhile, “poets measuring oceans” acknowledges the Bay Area’s cultural soft power. The non-symmetrical wings “moving toward balance” reframe uneven growth as a new paradigm of harmony-in-diversity.

4. Language and Rhythm
The poem’s rhythm alternates between lyrical delicacy (“delicate patterns, plunging dance steps”) and declarative strength (“blue sails unfurled, waves beneath your keel”). This musicality mirrors the dynamic tempo of the Bay Area’s development. The layering of classical imagery with modern materials provides stylistic depth and unity.

5. Multi-layered Themes and Contemporary Significance
Beyond praise, the poem engages with globalisation, innovation, and identity. The butterfly becomes a metaphor for the Bay Area’s fusion of tradition and modernity, local distinctiveness and international reach. The closing image—“a copper coin steering the tides of an age”—links ancient currency with modern economic leadership, symbolising continuity and transformation.

6. Alignment with the Greater Bay Area Vision
From cocoon to soaring flight, the poem mirrors the Bay Area’s trajectory as China’s frontier of reform and opening. It embodies innovation, openness, and resilience, while situating the region as both a domestic powerhouse and a global force.

Conclusion
“A Butterfly Setting Sail” successfully fuses rich symbolism, layered metaphor, and rhythmic beauty to portray the Greater Bay Area’s rise. Its language is refined, its structure progressive, and its themes both local and global. More than a poem of praise, it is a reflection on development, imperfection, and transformation—imbued with contemporary significance and artistic value。

供稿：中国香港散文诗学会，国际华文诗人协会、《中国香港散文诗》杂志、《世界华文诗报》、中国香港文化艺术基金会中国香港散文诗学会。

Author Bio:
Sue Zhu, a New Zealand Chinese poet, artist, currently resides in Auckland and Dubai. Her poetry has received multiple prestigious literary awards in China, Italy, Spain, and the United States, and she has been nominated three times for the American Pushcart Prize. She has been featured in interviews by Publishers Weekly and China’s Xinhua News Agency. Her published works include several poetry and translation collections, such as The Beat. She has been invited to numerous international poetry festivals and artists’ symposiums in Spain, Macedonia, South Korea, Medellín, Venezuela, Serbia, Mexico, Morocco, and beyond. Her paintings have also been exhibited at international events such as Dylan Day and featured on the covers of various international poetry collections.

诗人简介：苏朱，新西兰华裔诗人、艺术家，现居奥克兰与迪拜两地。诗歌曾获中国、意大利、西班牙、美国等国多项知名文学奖，三度美国“手推车”奖提名并接受了该国《出版商周刊》《传神》等杂志、西班牙城市电台及中国新华社的专访，出版过《节拍》等多部诗集与翻译集，受邀参加了西班牙、马其顿、韩国、麦德林、委内瑞拉、塞尔维亚、墨西哥、摩洛哥等多个国际诗歌节与艺术家研讨会。绘画作品曾在国际迪伦日等活动及作为多个国际诗集的封面展出。